Wrong E-Mail Address

A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a
particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they
spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier.

Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel
schedules. So, the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday,
with his wife flying down the following day.

The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he
decided to send an email to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one
letter in her email address, and without realizing his error, sent the
e-mail.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from her
husband's funeral. He was a Baptist minister who was called home to glory
following a heart attack.

The widow decided to check her e-mail expecting messages from relatives and
friends. After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted.

The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and
saw the computer screen which read:

To:  My Loving Wife
Subject:  I've Arrived
Date:  May 21, 2013

I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and
you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I've just arrived and
have been checked in.

I've seen that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow.
Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is as uneventful as
mine was.

P. S. Sure is freaking hot down here!!!

Why Having a Home Mortgage is Financially Stressful

Taking out a mortgage on a home is one of the most stressful financial decisions a person or couple will have to make. Like a “Dooms Day Prepper”, one has to plan for all scenarios.

Do your homework on Mortgage Life and Term Insurance before you consider purchasing a home. Many insurance companies are now changing how they assess you for insurance by having the policy “underwritten” upfront. This could be because Marketplace a Canadian T.V. series aired an episode five years ago on Mortgage Life Insurance. Apparently, you are only being approved to make insurance premium payments. It is not until the event of a death that the policy is “underwritten” and scrutinized to the point that it may be denied. All the insurance premium payments you have made will be refunded. This is great for the insurance companies because most people outlive the policy.

Real estate prices have risen dramatically across Canada since 2004 by 100%. If you were not a previous homeowner getting into the housing market now is very expensive. I can only imagine the stress young couples must feel trying to buy their first home.

My advise would be to start small, increase the value of your home by doing some renovating, and if necessary purchase a home with rental potential, for example a legal basement suite. Check with your City Hall for zoning bylaws, etc. and never act on hearsay, as the information may not be accurate.

The more fact finding you do will help concrete your home ownership plans and make the experience less stressful and rewarding.

Having Fun with Numbers

1.  Take your shoe size (only whole sizes).
2.  Multiply it by 5.
3.  Add 50.
4.  Multiply by 20.
5.  Add 1012, or 1013 if your birthday has already occurred.
6.  Subtract the year you were born.

The first digit is your shoe size while the last 2 digits are your age.

Dog in Baby Backpack Harness!

 

The Best Recycling Opinion - "The Green Thing"

This was emailed to me, and it is quite comical and worth the read:

When I was checking out at the store the other day, the young cashier suggested to the much older woman in front of me, that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren't good for the environment.

The woman apologized and explained, "We didn't have this 'green thing' back in my earlier days."

The young clerk responded, "That's our problem today. Your generation did not care enough to save our environment for future generations."

She was right -- our generation didn't have the ‘green thing’ in its day.

Back then, we returned milk bottles, soda bottles and beer bottles to the store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed, sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were recycled.

But we didn't have the ‘green thing’ back in our day.

Grocery stores bagged our groceries in brown paper bags that we reused for numerous things, most memorable besides household garbage bags, was the use of brown paper bags as book covers for our schoolbooks. This was to ensure that public property, (the books provided for our use by the school) was not defaced by our scribbling. Then we were able to personalize our books on the brown paper bags.

But too bad we didn't do the ‘green thing’ back then.

We walked up stairs, because we didn't have an escalator in every store and office building. We walked to the grocery store and didn't climb into a 300-horsepower machine every time we had to go two blocks.

But she was right. We didn't have the ‘green thing’ in our day.

Back then, we washed the baby's diapers because we didn't have the throwaway kind. We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy-gobbling machine burning up 220 volts -- wind and solar power really did dry our clothes back in our early days. Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing.

But that young lady is right; we didn't have the ‘green thing’ back in our day.

Back then, we had one TV, or radio, in the house -- not a TV in every room. And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief (remember them?), not a screen the size of Prince Edward Island. In the kitchen, we blended and stirred by hand because we didn't have electric machines to do everything for us. When we packaged a fragile item to send in the mail, we used wadded up old newspapers to cushion it, not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap. Back then, we didn't fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to cut the lawn. We used a push mower that ran on human power. We exercised by working so we didn't need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity.

But she's right; we didn't have the ‘green thing’ back then.

We drank from a fountain when we were thirsty instead of using a cup or a plastic bottle every time we had a drink of water. We refilled writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and we replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got dull.

But we didn't have the ‘green thing’ back then.

Back then, people took the streetcar or a bus and kids rode their bikes to school or walked instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service in the family's $45,000 SUV or van, which cost what a whole house did before the ‘green thing’. We had one electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. And we didn't need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 23,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest burger joint.

But isn't it sad that the current generation laments how wasteful we old folks were just because we didn't have the ‘green thing’ back then?

Please forward this on to another selfish old person who needs a lesson in conservation from a smartass young person...

We don't like being old in the first place, so it doesn't take much to piss us off...especially from a smartass who can't make change without the cash register telling them how much.